From Self-Doubt to Self-Trust: Healing the Inner Radar That Got Scrambled by Narcissistic Abuse

One of the most painful aftershocks of narcissistic abuse is the way it scrambles your mind.

You start to question your memory, your emotions, even your sense of reality. You ask, “I must have got that wrong,” or  “Is it me?”  so often it becomes a reflex.

It’s a reaction to gaslighting, manipulation, and years of being told that you, and your instincts are wrong.

The Damage Done by Gaslighting

Narcissists specialise in eroding your confidence by: - Denying things you clearly saw or heard - Twisting your words - Blaming you for their behaviour - Using charm or fake concern to make you doubt yourself

Over time, this damages your internal compass—the very radar that helps you sense when something isn’t right.

Rebuilding Trust in Yourself

You can recover your inner knowing. Here’s how:

1. Start small. Make one small decision each day based on what you feel or want. Don’t second-guess it. Just notice the result.

2. Practise self-validation. Write down your thoughts and feelings without editing. Acknowledge them as real and valid, even if no one else sees them.

3. Get curious about your triggers. If something feels off, pause and ask, “What is this feeling trying to tell me?”

4. Reduce outside noise. Too much advice, even from well-meaning people, can crowd out your inner voice. Create space to listen inward.

5. Work with someone who gets it. Healing from this kind of manipulation takes specific support. You need someone who won’t dismiss or minimise your experience.

   
   

You Can Trust Yourself Again

Rebuilding self-trust isn’t about becoming perfect. It’s about becoming your own safest place.

Get in touch. Send me an email linda@lindabarbour.co.uk, or give me a call on 07795311354.

With warmth, Linda